Can we please just take a second to appreciate how fucking awesome Bo Burnham’s poetry book, Egghead, is. It is epic.
I cAME OUT TO MY FRIEND AND
My boyfriend of over 2 years sent me a game over skype. He said he wants to try and make Pokemon games since I play them so much. I opened it up and was super excited.
It seemed really well done and was super ready to start on my adventure!
He left a lot of…
My friend just went to pet cats at our local animal shelter, and found her cat that had been missing for over a year
Brb crying forever
let me tell you
about kerry shawcross
look at this motherfucker
he’s cute as hell too
like damn boy i need some a/c
THIS MAN IS A CHILD
HAS HE MELTED YOUR HEART YET? WELL JUST YOU FUCKING WAIT
he should stop, i know right
WHAT THE HELL IS THIS
no come here baby i’ll give you another mop
what a fucking idiot
he shows up in the weirdest fucking places too like what are you
LIKE WHAT THE HELL
I HATE YOU SO MUCH STOP THAT
get away from me
i’m gonna murder somebody
i’m fucking done
top six ways to insult boys
- purposefully forget their names
- any time yr talking about anything outside the realm of COD, energy drinks, or football, pause and giggle and say “oh, but sorry - you wouldn’t know anything about this, right? we can change the subject”
- extension on #1: call him by the name of another boy w the same hair color as him. when he protests, laugh and act like he’s trying to trick u
- "hold this." stop acknowledging him for the remainder of the encounter until it is time to collect you bag/purse/coat/etc
- "sorry, what? i wasn’t listening" rinse and repeat
- tilt yr head. make a cute face. “awwwwww”
- Gavin: Knock, knock.
- Ray: Who's there?
- Gavin: Shut up.
- Ray: Alright, shut up who?
- Ray: Shut up wHO?
- Ray: WHO'S AT THE DOOR??